January Thoughts

“What has God been teaching you lately?”

That being quiet and gentle, something I’ve struggled with my entire life, can be beautiful.
I’ve fought against it, roared into the sky for years that I’m NOT quiet and I’m NOT gentle. God created me with directness, with the ability to face confrontation head on, with the beautiful hardship of going against the grain. …and yet.
I always felt this prick of unease when I heard from seasoned believers that women were to be quiet and gentle in their demeanor…so I bucked against it. I didn’t embrace it, why would I?
Then, as I got older, and become a wife and a mother, Proverbs 31 (we all know it right?) began to sink deep into my bones; and now here I sit on a cold January morning pouring over the words and realizing, that woman, she is strong. If you read through what scripture calls “a Proverbs 31 woman” it’s honestly a sobering realization that God has called us to more, to so much more, and we need Him to be able to do it. She is a woman who loves, who labors, who is smart, kind, and wise…..and so much more. And yet, she can be all of those wild and wonderful and strong things…and have an air of gentleness. She can speak wisdom, laugh, and be a leader while pulling away for contemplation and quietness.

I thought for the longest time that to be a “good christian woman” was to embrace the sense of quiet and gentleness; yet I never understood what it actually meant. Being quiet doesn’t mean not speaking my mind, speaking wisdom, educating and learning, it means being able to pull alway to hear God’s voice, to reflect, and to restore. Gentleness doesn’t mean I’m a doormat or that I allow others to treat me with disrespect; it means that I approach hardship and conflict with care, that I take a breath when I feel anger rising and redirect it.
I’m constantly learning, praise God.
I hope you are too.

Proverbs 31: 10-31
¹⁰ An excellent wife who can find?
    She is far more precious than jewels.
¹¹ The heart of her husband trusts in her,
    and he will have no lack of gain.
¹² She does him good, and not harm,
    all the days of her life.
¹³ She seeks wool and flax,
    and works with willing hands.
¹⁴ She is like the ships of the merchant;
    she brings her food from afar.
¹⁵ She rises while it is yet night
    and provides food for her household
    and portions for her maidens.
¹⁶ She considers a field and buys it;
    with the fruit of her hands she plants a vineyard.
¹⁷ She dresses herself^[e] with strength
    and makes her arms strong.
¹⁸ She perceives that her merchandise is profitable.
    Her lamp does not go out at night.
¹⁹ She puts her hands to the distaff,
    and her hands hold the spindle.
²⁰ She opens her hand to the poor
    and reaches out her hands to the needy.
²¹ She is not afraid of snow for her household,
    for all her household are clothed in scarlet.^[f]
22 She makes bed coverings for herself;
    her clothing is fine linen and purple.
²³ Her husband is known in the gates
    when he sits among the elders of the land.
²⁴ She makes linen garments and sells them;
    she delivers sashes to the merchant.
²⁵ Strength and dignity are her clothing,
    and she laughs at the time to come.
²⁶ She opens her mouth with wisdom,
    and the teaching of kindness is on her tongue.
²⁷ She looks well to the ways of her household
    and does not eat the bread of idleness.
²⁸ Her children rise up and call her blessed;
    her husband also, and he praises her:
²⁹ “Many women have done excellently,
    but you surpass them all.”
³⁰ Charm is deceitful, and beauty is vain,
    but a woman who fears the Lord is to be praised.
³¹ Give her of the fruit of her hands,
    and let her works praise her in the gates.