i hate that word.
no change, lacking motivation, hitting a slump.
who wants to hear THAT?!
yet i am.
as i mentioned a few months ago, i’ve been maintaining my current weight.
which is all fine and well because i need to learn how to maintain.
i also realize that we’re in the middle of the holidays.
which on top of Jesus, family, friends, and fun is the big ol word(s) of GOOD FOOD.
bread, sweets, grandmas stuffing, sweet potato casserole, turkey on turkey, meatballs, mac and cheese, more bread, and sweet tea.
i want all of it.
every. single. last. bite.
and then my pants get tight.
i see the salt weight in my face and tummy.
and i start shaming myself.
and that is not ok.
no self-shame amy, no self-shame.
so i need a moment of honesty.
a moment of reflecting.
a moment to be 100% open with where i am on this journey…because it is a journey.
my pants have been tight.
and it’s because i’ve tricked myself into thinking i can have that sweet every day.
or that piece of pita bread won’t lead to three pieces.
or it’s ok if i skip a day, or 7, of working out.
that might work for some people (bless you)
but it doesn’t work for my body and my metabolism.
does it suck?
YOU BETCHA IT DOES.
i want to eat all the carbs and gain zero weight.
why couldn’t i get my mothers metabolism?
so i have few “goal pieces” staring at me in the closet.
mocking me really.
and i just need to tell them to shut up.
i don’t need to hear their sass.
what i need to do is re-motivate myself.
find joy in the workouts.
find new recipes to try.
find people to partner with to push me past this plateau.
onto bigger and better things.
so a few goals to get me through the end of the year:
// clean up my diet.
yes i will allow myself to indulge on christmas eve/day. i can’t have other huge cheat days. clean it up!
// stay consistent in workouts.
get out of bed, and make it happen. if that means i work out with someone else, or find accountability in another form.
// do at least ONE sit-up hanging from the bag.
it looks like this in case you’re curious. i can currently get up on the bag, wrap my legs and cling for a few minutes. when i try to let go and lean back i fall, hard, on my butt. i think this has a lot to do with the fear of re-injuring my legs. so this will require A LOT of core & leg work over the remaining month.
// no processed sugars
minus the holiday, because lets keep it real, there will be processed sugar.